Funny Government Quotes

April 30, 2009 at 5:58 am (Daily Joke, Daily Jokes, Funny, Funny Humor, Funny Joke, Funny Jokes, Humor, Humorous, Joke of the Day, Jokes) (, , , , , , )

Funny Quotes – Government Quotes

A government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul.

– George Bernard Shaw

Quotes

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Government Quotes

April 29, 2009 at 6:35 am (Daily Joke, Daily Jokes, Funny, Funny Humor, Funny Joke, Funny Jokes, Humor, Humorous, Joke of the Day, Jokes) (, , , , , , , , , , )

Funny Quotes – Government Quotes

I contend that for a nation to try to tax itself into prosperity is like a man standing in a bucket and trying to lift himself up by the handle.

– Winston Churchill

Sayings

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Government Quotes

April 28, 2009 at 7:18 am (Daily Joke, Daily Jokes, Funny, Funny Humor, Funny Joke, Funny Jokes, Humor, Humorous, Joke of the Day, Jokes) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , )

Funny Quotes – Government Quotes

Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But then I repeat myself.

– Mark Twain

Famous Quotes

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Funny Quotes – Government Quotes

April 27, 2009 at 6:15 am (Daily Joke, Daily Jokes, Funny, Funny Humor, Funny Joke, Funny Jokes, Humor, Humorous, Joke of the Day, Jokes) (, , , , , , , )

Funny Quotes – Government Quotes

If you don’t read the newspaper, you are uninformed; if you do read the newspaper, you are misinformed.

– Mark Twain

Quotes of the Day

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Funny Quotes – Government Quotes

April 26, 2009 at 11:15 am (Daily Joke, Daily Jokes, Funny, Funny Humor, Funny Joke, Funny Jokes, Humor, Humorous, Joke of the Day, Jokes) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , )

In my many years I have come to a conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm, and three or more is a Congress.

– John Adams

Quote of the Day

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Johann Strauss – Joke of the Day

April 19, 2009 at 1:01 pm (Daily Joke, Daily Jokes, Funny, Funny Humor, Funny Joke, Funny Jokes, Humor, Humorous, Joke of the Day, Jokes) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

Joke of the Day

Johann Strauss was an avid mountain climber who once waltzed himself into deep trouble. He lost his footing and found himself hanging by his fingertips over a bottomless gorge.

Another climber heroically came to his rescue and just managed to grab Johann by a strap of his backpack to save the Maestro’s life. Since then, the act of trying to get out of a seemingly hopeless situation has come to be known as…

…grasping at Strauss.

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Lion Tamer Needed

April 10, 2009 at 4:51 pm (Daily Joke, Daily Jokes, Funny, Funny Humor, Funny Joke, Funny Jokes, Humor, Humorous, Joke of the Day, Jokes) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

Funny Jokes

Joke of the Day

A circus owner runs an ad for a lion tamer and two people show up. One is a good looking, older retired golfer in his late sixties and the other is a gorgeous blonde in her mid-twenties.. The circus owner tells them, “I’m not going to sugar coat it. This is one ferocious lion. He ate my last tamer so you two had better be good or you’re history. Here’s your equipment — chair, whip and a gun. Who wants to try out first?”

The girl says, “I’ll go first.” She walks past the chair, the whip and the gun and steps right into the lion’s cage. The lion starts to snarl and pant and begins to charge her. About halfway there, she throws open her coat revealing her beautiful naked body. The lion stops dead in his tracks, sheepishly crawls up to her and starts licking her feet and ankles. He continues to lick and kiss her entire body for several minutes and then rests his head at her feet.

The circus owner’s jaw is on the floor. He says, “I’ve never seen a display like that in my life.” He then turns to the retired golfer and asks, “Can you top that?” The tough old golfer replies,

“No problem, just get that lion out of there

Jokes Funny Jokes

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Horrible Car Wreck

April 3, 2009 at 9:39 am (Daily Joke, Daily Jokes, Funny, Funny Humor, Funny Joke, Funny Jokes, Humor, Humorous, Joke of the Day, Jokes) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , )

THE CAR WRECK

The first year student had just gotten a beat up old VW beetle from his parents. When he took it for a spin, he misjudged the curve and overturned the car directly between the house of Mr and Mrs Smith and Mr and Mrs Balls

… luckily, he was pulled out by the Smiths.

Funny Jokes

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